My Message for Mental Health Awareness week...
Updated: Jul 6, 2020
Dear Head Fuck called Depression Thank you for all you have done for me by showing up in my life. I don’t remember inviting you but looking back I am grateful you took time to stop by. Because looking back I can see just how much you taught me and that without your stay I would not have seen what I now see, and I would not have done the introspective work I have. 🔸You see when you served me up day after day of waking up with a black cloud over my head, you made me stop and put new habits in place to ensure I had a reason to get up with excitement to face the day.
🔸When you asked me to believe I was a burden and that no one would want my company, I found out who my true friends were and deepened our connection.
🔸When you put my head in such a state of insecurity that I wouldn’t commit to plans or cancelled them at the last minute, you helped me look within to ensure that the things I planned were actually serving me for a great purpose and not just for those around me.
🔸When you took away my appetite and made me want to throw up each time I ate, you helped me lose weight I’d wanted to lose for years but not had the will power to do.
🔸When you brought forth tears with abundance, till the rivers ran swift, you taught me that being human isn’t all about fake smiles.
🔸When you encouraged me to beat myself up because I was a failure in everything, you helped me to see I had ‘failed’ many times because I’d been trying and that the real meaning of failure is to not try at all. So today, if you are going through that Head Fuck called Depression know from me that you can choose to reframe it & here is why: Because when you are tempted to think you are bad person who deserves no good, know that you are just you, in a low place, who deserves as much good as anyone else. 🤗 And when you feel it is all your fault and you have failed everyone, know that it is never all your fault and there are always other factors and people at work. Today I am choosing to feel gratitude for the lessons I learned from the time you - Depression - took up residence. I realised that pain only continues as long as I allow it to, and that I can stop it by focusing instead on what I want in life and not what I don’t want. I hadn’t realised is just how powerful my thoughts were. 💭 I learnt through mindset work, that the more positives you focus on and the more positive things you tell yourself are going to happen – the more actually do happen. When I realised this, I figured I had to take advantage of flipping this amazing tool I’d been using to unwittingly cause havoc in my life. I decided I was going to get the majority of those 100 billion neurons 🧠 I had (yes, I’m counting on them all being there!) in the top story to work in my favour and stop harming me. I reached out to the tools and people I had around me to help turn them around – to focus them on what I wanted to happen in my life and not what I didn’t want to happen. I took ownership and realised that I was the fully capable of removing that house guest – Head Fuck Depression – from my top story and replacing it with Hope, Ambition and Bright Future. 🌅 Now I have more good times than bad, and I know just how much control I have in this process. I see the thoughts that help me and the ones that don’t and know how to change them for those that will serve me. So, this shoot was for all those that are feeling the way I felt and can’t talk about it. Because I’m not looking for sympathy, but if I can reach one person and let them know, you are not alone, and yes, it’s possible to get out of the Head Fuck! Taking care of my mindset is as important to me as indulging in my favourite Mac N Cheese and seeing I want to be around people that see the best in me when I can’t see it myself. Despite being a sea mist of pain and gloom I knew I didn’t want this to last into the future, I wanted a better life, I wanted what I knew I deep down was capable of – a good, happy, prosperous life – which is what we all deserve. So, I just want to let you know, if you are officially in a Head Fuck right now. I get it. And if you need someone to talk to please drop me a line and tell me what it is you want to feel right now more than anything. I see you trying to heal and get unfucked. Don’t quit. Please. 🤗👊💪 #worldmentalhealthday #mindcharity #getunfucked #mentalhealthawareness #speakoutaboutmentalhealth #theheadfuckdepression #fierclyindependentchick #thefreedomchick
A massive thanks to: Photographer: Charlotte Munford Studio: London Camera Exchange - Bristol MUA & Hairstylist: Leilani-Chyna Thomas